Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Just a quick take here.  That guy on Jeopardy that's won like eight billion dollars...?!  A total fraud.  Oh sure, he's pretty sharp, but what he has that nobody else has is perfect timing.  Most people don't know this, but Jeopardy has become a show of timing and not knowledge.  You can't buzz in until Alex finishes the last syllable of the last word or you'll be locked out for 0.2 seconds (which is plenty of time if the questions/answers have been dumbed down enough for everyone to know the correct response).

Seriously, watch the other players.  They're trying to buzz in, meaning they know the answers (or at least have a reasonable guess).  He's the one who always gets in though, because he has Alex's mid-Canadian cadence down pat, possibly because Mormons from Utah are just like prolific, polygamous Canadians without accents. 

They changed the rules for the new stupid-audience-friendly Alex-version.  In the superior Art Fleming version, you could buzz in as soon as the answer was revealed, even if you hadn't read it yet...  hence JEOPARDY.  In essence, you were gambling that your knowledge of a given category would allow you to correctly respond to whatever answer was posed.  Now that they have ridiculous cryptic category names to amuse the masses and Alex wants everyone to hear the proper pronunciation of fleur de lis, they discarded the gambling aspect of the game.

How do I know all this?  Well, cue up the Weird Al Yankovic... because I lost on Jeopardy.  In June.  1988.  All those who saw me, raise your hands....  I was the guy who said "Shit" and was white-sounded out.  Yay me! 


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