Valentine's Day

Most of the blogs I’ve read today contain some sort of anti-Valentine’s Day rant. Y’know, “Hallmark Holiday” and all that… Frankly, I call today “Tuesday”. Yeah, I coughed up $50 to send my wife flowers in response to the multiple hints that have been dropping like American skiers for the past week. But, really, it’s no big deal. I’d spend more than that if it gets me peace and quiet for a week. All the ranting and raving from the men just makes the women more argumentative and bitchy. Better to spend a buy-in and get some leave-me-alone equity.

My biggest problem is that my wife’s birthday falls right between Christmas and Valentine’s Day, meaning I have to pop for gifts THREE times in seven weeks. Not only that, but she somehow expects me to grow a romantic inkling at some point, and choose something thoughtful and surprising.

BUZZZZZZ! Tell her what she didn’t win…

Typically, I take her out for a nice dinner (bonus points because I get to eat), and spring for something “thoughtful” like a massage or facial for either her birthday or Valentine’s, meaning I’m stuck for something “surprising” on the other. After 18 years together, I can’t do anymore surprising. Oh sure, I could surprise her with a Craftsman 18-drawer rolling tool chest (the red one), but that probably wouldn’t be a “good” surprise.

So, this year we’ll be going to the SAP Open tennis tournament, not because she asked to go, but because I got free tickets. We’re taking my son and having a lovely expensive dinner at the arena and watching Andy Roddick smash the beejeebus out of some poor qualifier.

Surprise!