Warning: Self-congratulatory poker content ahead!

I’d been losing money lately on Party. Yes, you read that right… LOSING at Party. I know all the bloggers talk about killing the Party fish, blah blah blah, and I am net cash-positive for my time at Party, but I had been bleeding money back for about a week. I was playing like shit, tossing away SnG buy-ins like they were beads at Mardi Gras, going all-in within the first three rounds on beatable hands, trying to bluff out calling stations (never a good idea), and chasing draws without pot odds. Small potatoes, sure, but dropping $100 in a week still sucks, especially when it’s from bad play and not bad luck.

So I found myself down to $17 in my Party account last night. My college-educated brain quickly figured that I could play a $5+1 and a $10+1, assuming the worst. I decided to start with the lower buy-in, well, just because. Anyway, Trevor (my 11-year old) wanted to sweat me since he has been banned from playing any computer or video games due to a homework fuck-up. So despite being a mediocre poker player at best, I started talking him through the hands [Remember, those who cannot do, teach. Those who cannot teach, manage. Those who cannot do, teach, or manage, end up executives.] I impressed him early by calling a couple of hands accurately, putting one guy on a K-high flush and another on a set. While I was teaching my son how to categorize other players, I was improving my read on the table. “So-and-so is a calling station. Watch the way he limps every hand.” Or “So-and-so is weak-tight, I can bluff him out.”

Basically, the entire table was an open book, partially because I was using the table as a textbook to teach my son how to THINK during a NLHE tournament. Of course, some of it was because it WAS Party and it WAS $5+1. And yes, I ran over the passive table and won the damn thing, bumping my “bankroll” to over $35. Woo hoo!

In checking back, I didn’t even have an abnormal number of premium hands. I had KK once (lost when AA5 flopped, K on turn, 5 on river for Aces full for someone who called my big pre-flop raise with A4), QQ once (held up), and AQo once. Out of 81 hands! So it’s not like the deck ran over me, I just had a good read on the table and was allowed to limp with a lot of really borderline hands.

I guess what I’m saying is that it was helpful for me to talk through my thought process as I was playing online. For early evening, I’ll continue to use my son. I may bring over a stuffed animal or my dog for post 9pm sessions, just to have someone to talk to, a friendly ear to bend regarding the various players and plays at the table. It forces me to actually defend my plays, rather than simply clicking with impunity. Of course, I’ll look like a complete moron to my family, but that’s something I can live with.