Thursday, June 02, 2005

I’ve decided it’s a good time for me to follow the trend (being completely unoriginal) of blogging some random facts about myself:

1. For those who are new around here, I came in second in a WPBT event last year, before the advent of the rankings, losing to MtDewVirus in the king of all heads-up battles.
2. I was on Jeopardy in 1988. Post-Art Fleming and pre-Ken Jennings. I said “Shit” when I missed a question and was white-sounded out.
3. I was one of the first geeks to actually court my wife via email (again in 1988). Long story short, she was the IT Help Desk Admin in SoCal, I was a new hire in NoCal. A friend told me she was cute, so I starting flirting with her via email and voicemail sight unseen. The rest is history.
4. My wife was a finalist in Miss Torrance. Funny thing is, I think she’s prettier now than she was back then.
5. Our fifteenth wedding anniversary is next week (6/9).
6. I am a third-generation Japanese-American, and consider myself an American of Japanese descent.
7. I go all-in more often with nothing than with the nuts.
8. I eat at least five cheeseburgers a week, mostly at Carl’s Jr or Jack in the Box
9. I’m a strapping 5’7”, 165 lbs.
10. I’ve bowled a perfect game.
11. At various times over the last ten years, I’ve been a trainer, a training manager, a training specialist, and a training consultant… in software, hardware, financial services, retail, and bio-tech.
12. I change jobs a lot.
13. I fold Ace-rag more than I probably should, especially short-handed.
14. I skipped the first grade.
15. I graduated high school in 1980 at the age of sixteen. Teri Hatcher graduated in 1982 from the same school.
16. I once won a $5 bet by sticking an entire McDonalds cheeseburger in my mouth.
17. I get really irritated when people misspell.
18. I believe that Joe Montana is a God, put on the earth to spread the gospel of the 4th quarter comeback.
19. My kids are waaayyyy cuter than your kids.
20. In my spare time, I like to do Cryptic Crosswords.
21. I also lost on a short-lived gameshow hosted by Dick Clark called The Challengers. I didn’t swear on that one.
22. 1430 on the SAT, 760 on the GMAT. Add those up and you get diddly.squat.
23. Never been arrested, though I’ve stood by and watched friends get cuffed and dragged down to the station. I even picked them up when they were released.
24. My favorite beer isn’t even sold in the US, Molson Ultra Dry.
25. Welcome to the Bay Area: Gallon of unleaded $2.59, 1372 sq ft house $650,000, five terrible sports teams… priceless.
26. Mary Ann > Ginger
27. I once worked with Tiger Woods’ half-sister Royce. She used to brag about her teenaged brother that was winning SoCal junior golf tourneys in the late eightiesl. I told her that I’d kick his ass if I ever got the chance. By the time I met him in person, he had already won two US Amateurs. I genuflected at his feet and embarrassed both him and my wife.
28. I was once fired from a job for telling someone that I would “break their skinny little neck”. That same person was subsequently fired for threatening someone else.
29. According to standardized IQ tests, I am a genius.
30. According to my wife, I’m an absent-minded professor and a slob.
31. I’m usually the guy who is prodding the drunkest guy to do something stupid.
32. I was on the basketball court during the game where UCLA suffered their worst defeat in school history (48 pts to Stanford). I was running a promo for Compaq where audience members shot free throws. Most free throws won a laptop. A ten-year old kid beat a sixty-year old who couldn’t reach the rim.
33. I’ve had 11 dogs in my life (Snippy, Tootsie, Tubby, Taffy, Sneakers, Brownie, Poppy, Chip, Pepper, Muffin, and Lucky). Snippy and Tootsie were the first two, the next seven were puppies from three litters, Muffin was an inbred grandchild, Lucky (the current dog) is a rescue from the Humane Society.
34. I don’t like cats.
35. I own ten Star Trek episodes on VHS.
36. I helped launch the Books R Us program for Western Publishing. If you’ve been in a Toys R Us that has a carpeted book area in the back, I was part of the pilot program for it.
37. I have exactly one eagle, a chip-in from the fringe after a driver-three iron went slightly over the green.
38. The girl I took to the Homecoming Dance in my senior year was later imprisoned for passing bad checks.
39. I worked with DONKEYPUNCHER at a dotbomb.
40. I ragged Tommy Lasorda when I saw him at a resort, then was horrified to find out he was the featured speaker for my company sales meeting the next day.
41. I was voted “Most Likely to Succeed” in the seventh and eighth grades.
42. I’ve never been outside of North America.
43. I think “Friends” and “Seinfeld” were overrated. So were “ET” and “The Natural”.
44. I think that f-bombs are a necessary (and underutilized) part of language. They convey a great deal of emotional and rhetorical impact, get everyone’s attention, and are rarely misunderstood. How many fucking words can you say that about?
45. I miss Battlebots.
46. I believe in capital punishment. In fact, I think there should be a pay-per-view that shows gladiatorial combat between death row inmates. Winner gets a private cell for 30 days (till his next match) with full hotel amenities. Loser… well, dies. Death row costs drop 50% immediately, revenues from pay-per-view go up…. Win-win.
47. I rank the Star Wars films thusly: Empire Strikes Back, Star Wars, Revenge of the Sith, Return of the Jedi, Attack of the Clones, and the lamentably horrid Phantom Menace.
48. Bad News Bears > Sandlot…. And while I’m at it… Field of Dreams > The Natural
49. Current favorite non-premium hand to play = 87 sooted.
50. I’ve never read Super System or Theory of Poker or Winning Low-limit HoldEm.
51. If you’ve read this far, you probably know more about me than all my groomsmen combined.


At 5:34 AM, Blogger cantseefade said...

Hey, I've been talking about the Death row gladiatoral games for years. It could have a tournament format with the winner getting some sort of special treatment where he could be the trainer for future tournaments. All inmates would get months of weapons and fighting training leading up to the event. As long as everyone voluntarily signs a waiver to compete I don't see how this is anything but a multi-billion dollar money maker.

At 10:27 AM, Blogger Donkeypuncher said...

You call what you did there *work*?

Boom goes the Dynamite!


At 10:30 PM, Blogger chroma said...

If you like Battlebots and other fighting robots, you might want to check out
the Robot Fighting League.

There's likely an event in your area. Also Battlebots themselves are having a new tourney in Rochester, NY.

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